The Imbalance
A long time ago there were some events in my life that led me towards undesirable brain chemistry. For the most part, I’ve dealt with my emotional demons and put them behind me, but that imbalance in my brain remains.
There are pills and I have a puppy. That is usually enough to keep me from feeling the full force of my depression. I’m able to maintain my willpower and emotional stability. But that stability is built from a house of cards. A delicate structure that can collapse with even the slightest disturbance. And once it falls, it can take a while to build again.
Too many people think it is purely a sadness. Sadness in depression is like Bon Jovi’s keyboard player. He plays a solo from time to time, but no one really knows his name. Stress, anxiety, exhaustion, lack of sleep, and a consistent plethora of negative emotions are all members of the depression band. I do wish some people would stop thinking this complex illness is only the damn keyboard player.
So what does a comedian do when depression hits, the ideas dry up, and he has people to entertain?
My current strategy is to post cute animals and hope no one notices I haven’t been creating much lately. Unfortunately when I hit these slumps I always lose a big chunk of my audience. It feels like I’m taking a step back. It’s that same feeling as forgetting to save your game, your thumb spazzes, and you jump directly into a canyon.
“I have to do all that again?”
The good news is that these slumps never last. I will regain my mojo and the ideas will return.
Until then, cute animal pictures.
(via wilwheaton)
